Britney Spears is 33 Today, So I Listened to "3" Eleven Times in a Row and It Was Amazing

As you probably know, Britney Spears turns 33 today. It's so emotional, the sky is literally crying its goddamn eyes out. It's always fun to find some creative way to honor the greatest pop star of my lifetime on the anniversary of her birth in a manger somewhere, and this year I thought I'd listen to her 2009 hit "3" eleven times on repeat (you know, cuz it makes...33 ok you got it, sorry) and share if I had any thoughts while doing so. Here's how it went.

Britney doing "3" on tour, no fucks given

I am about to listen to "3" eleven times in a row for @britneyspears' 33rd birthday. The event will be live-tweeted. #britney3x11
— Vertigo Shtick (@Vertigo_Shtick) December 2, 2014

First memory is how ridiculous it was that radio stations edited out "living in sin" #britney3x11
— Vertigo Shtick (@Vertigo_Shtick) December 2, 2014

I remember this impressing me back in 2009 as well, but it's so cool how Max Martin adds a little more to each chorus #britney3x11
— Vertigo Shtick (@Vertigo_Shtick) December 2, 2014

Oh, it's more specific than just each chorus - he adds something to each four-bar phrase in EACH CHORUS #britney3x11
— Vertigo Shtick (@Vertigo_Shtick) December 2, 2014

This song really exists in its own universe. It doesnt sound like Gaga, who was ascendent at the time, nor the EDM pop after it #britney3x11
— Vertigo Shtick (@Vertigo_Shtick) December 2, 2014

Trying to find the piece I wrote about it at the time #britney3x11
— Vertigo Shtick (@Vertigo_Shtick) December 2, 2014

Or 3.... or 4.... #britney3x11
— Vertigo Shtick (@Vertigo_Shtick) December 2, 2014

I found it: "Why I Still Think "3" Is A Charm" http://t.co/pQwSyhzvrv #britney3x11
— Vertigo Shtick (@Vertigo_Shtick) December 2, 2014

For play #5, watching the music video #britney3x11
— Vertigo Shtick (@Vertigo_Shtick) December 2, 2014

Kind of sad - can see the dead eyes I refused to see at the time #britney3x11
— Vertigo Shtick (@Vertigo_Shtick) December 2, 2014

Although I do see the flashes of life that gave me hope back then #britney3x11
— Vertigo Shtick (@Vertigo_Shtick) December 2, 2014

Seven plays in, this tune still a banger #britney3x11
— Vertigo Shtick (@Vertigo_Shtick) December 2, 2014

A little history, lest anyone's forgotten: "3" DEBUTED at #1 on the Hot 100, the fifteenth song in history to do so #3x11
— Vertigo Shtick (@Vertigo_Shtick) December 2, 2014

Oh it was also her first of two CONSECUTIVE singles to debut at #1 on the Hot 100 (oops..."Hold It Against Me" did it again) #britney3x11
— Vertigo Shtick (@Vertigo_Shtick) December 2, 2014

Also, how badass feminist is Britney for being like "yeah let's do a 3way... with another dude" #britney3x11
— Vertigo Shtick (@Vertigo_Shtick) December 2, 2014

This whackadoodle yet adorable comment is #1 on the YouTube video #britney3x11 pic.twitter.com/qPIxYgNBGl
— Vertigo Shtick (@Vertigo_Shtick) December 2, 2014

Oh no, already on play #10 and I'm gonna be sad when this is over #britney3x11
— Vertigo Shtick (@Vertigo_Shtick) December 2, 2014

I swear though, this build Max Martin creates in the choruses. Starts very "bum. bum." ends like "BAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAM" #britney3x11
— Vertigo Shtick (@Vertigo_Shtick) December 2, 2014

Yet he still has the hand claps underneath it all - sentimental softie :) #britney3x11
— Vertigo Shtick (@Vertigo_Shtick) December 2, 2014

Everyone, on the last chorus of "3" #britney3x11 pic.twitter.com/3FCLnDmmAG
— Vertigo Shtick (@Vertigo_Shtick) December 2, 2014

Oh no, my eleven times in a row of "3" is almost over :( *ROCKS OUT* #britney3x11
— Vertigo Shtick (@Vertigo_Shtick) December 2, 2014

Well, those 38 minutes of "3" went by too fast. Happy birthday @britneyspears - so glad you came through #britney3x11 pic.twitter.com/GGkFXN30jV
— Vertigo Shtick (@Vertigo_Shtick) December 2, 2014

There, wasn't that riveting? It really is quite a good song, though, isn't it?