Jennifer Lopez is the quintessential loveable underdog of pop music, like Miss Rhode Island in Miss Congeniality with her too hot hot chocolate and her flaming batons and Satan's panties. Heaven knows she's been chronically unlucky in love; sometimes it's by her less than brilliant choices in men, but overall she's more Jennifer Aniston than Kim Kardashian. You have to admire her optimism as she inevitably bounces back no matter how many times she gets bruised. Her current job as judge on American Idol was a much deserved life-raft that saved her from drowning in the sea of Female Entertainers Over 40 in which so many careers are lost, and the bonafide success of the 2011 single "On the Floor" was like compensation for falling on her ass on national television during her "'Gimme More' at the VMAs" performance of the would-be comeback single "Louboutins" a year earlier.
Speaking of that famed posterior...well, that! In her memoir Bossypants, Tina Fey accurately credits Lopez with bringing about a new global appreciation for the ample backside at a time when it seemed like anorexia might be the only route to stardom. While we're on the subject, let's not forget who wore one of the greatest outfits in Grammy history, scoring a big one for the curves upstairs too. Lopez's sex appeal was never unseemly or exploitative, either: even in a dress suited for open heart surgery she still didn't come off like a tramp. When Pitbull refers to her as "the world's most beautiful woman" in "Dance Again," it's not a terribly big overstatement.
|The twins, before the twins.|
And, since I did the physical judgments with J.Lo and don't want to be sexist, there is something inescapably sexy about Pitbull, though I've never managed to put my finger on exactly what that is. Believe me, I've checked myself on this point many times over the years, and each time reaffirms my general willingness to have sex with him. Also, I'm pretty sure that if he heard me say that he'd laugh and find it amusing and flattering and go on with his day, as opposed to the more homophobic responses I'd expect from most male hip-hop performers, which also adds to his appeal.
In fact, positivity and fun are characteristic of both these artists. They don't take their art too seriously or try to be anything other than what they are. They know their strengths and don't get caught up on their weaknesses because they're confident enough as artists and aren't excessively vain. They're not trying to create masterpieces like Lady Gaga, but neither are they content to crank out the bare minimum like Rihanna; they don't show their sweat and effort like Katy Perry but they do commit fully to the music they make, like Ke$ha. Their songs may not stray far from the joys of getting drunk at the club and dancing the night away, but they're there for us when we want to escape, as we often do with pop. They provide us with good quality music that's assembled with care, and, most of all, that exists simply to make people smile and move their bodies. Sometimes I just want to dance. Is that a crime?
All right then.
"Dance Again" (feat. Pitbull) is available on iTunes and Amazon.